Amir Mateen

ISLAMABAD: The PML-Nawaz (PML-N) government might think differently but we the pen-pushers really owe it to Abid Lion Ali for making our jobs much easier.

Budget session can be really taxing to report, mostly yawn-evoking speeches, day after day. Thursday was just another dull day when we were scavenging for a story, some new angle to write about. Roars in Abid Lion Ali.

He specialises in creating a mess out of virtually nothing—budget and the government’s responsibility to keep order in the house be damned. It all started when MQM’s Sajid Ali accused the Punjab government for nurturing “terrorists like Gullu Butt,” who seemed to have become a permanent feature of our political lexicon.

Both sides got involved in a shouting match. Government benches generally show more restraint so that the budget could be passed smoothly. But the PML-N camp was rudderless in the absence of senior ministers, particularly the incorrigible Faisalabad squad of wits, Abid Lion Ali joined by Mian Mannan. As if things were less chaotic, Jamshed Dasti joined the fray. Dasti was like a red rag to Abid Lion Ali. We could not tell what exactly provoked the lion part of Abid Ali but we saw him rushing towards Dasti for a physical fight. He was stopped by a bunch of party colleagues who finally took him away but not before he had vented out his spleen on Dasti.

Thankfully, he was away from his mike but we could hear him cursing that involved mothers and sisters (why always women, WAF take note).

As if the Qadri fiasco in Lahore was not enough. As if the government needed another issue to distract public opinion from the budget and Operation Zarb-i-Azb. We noticed Khawaja Asif (over) eating a humble pie recently. Perhaps Mr Lion also needs to show a little humility, considering the state of affairs in his Water and Power Ministry. The government should be on the defensive for reneging on its electoral promise of ending load shedding in six months.

It’s a scary situation if Asad Omer’s figures are to be believed.

We are told Independent Power Projects (IPP), once again, served notice to invoke sovereign guarantee due to non-payment by the government. Where is the money that the government got from massive electricity price increase, he asked. Line losses, instead of coming down, have increased by more than two per cent; government receivables have shot up by nearly Rs100 billion to touch the Rs500 billion mark. After paying Rs480 billion to power companies less than a year ago, the circular debt is back to over Rs300 billion. Where is this Rs300 billion reflected in the budget, asked PTI’s shadow Finance Minister. Perhaps Ishaq Dar could explain because we do not have a clue. On top of this, as heat goes up so does the load-shedding.

Yet a circus of sorts is going on with too many cooks locked in the Water and Power kitchen. The PML-N retained an Advisor to the Prime Minister, one Mussadaq Malik, from the caretaker government under pressure from a tycoon who has energy interests. The gentleman was earlier introduced in the Masharraf government as a development expert. The new lady secretary can’t get over her craving to be seen on TV screens while raiding power companies. In his first speech in the third tenure, Nawaz Sharif had promised to evaluate ministries every three months. We just hope that when he finally does that, it’s not just a reshuffle. Perhaps a few heads need to be rolled.

Another ministry that came under attack was none other than Interior. It got the maximum cut motions, which means that members wanted to know why it should be given funds for such gross losses.

While Marvi Memon continues to occupy his seat, the Parliament is beginning to miss Chaudhry Nisar—mostly for wrong reasons. PPP’s Ehsanur Rehman wondered if anybody from the PML-N had cared to visit the Chaudhry of Chakri Sharif. At least Billy the Kid had the courtesy to do that. Actually, there is no official word about his health. One of his colleagues had disclosed that he was advised bed rest till Zarb-e-Azb was over. This could mean anything. What if this takes two years?

Meanwhile, his ministry came under sharp criticism. PPP’s Shagufta Jamani lamented that Pakistan had shot to 105th position on the law and order index. How do we deal with the situation when we do not have either a foreign minister or a functional interior minister?

PTI’s Rai Hassan Nawaz, a veteran from Chichawatni who made quite an impact, ripped apart the performance of the interior ministry, particularly the FIA.

PPP’s Nauman Sheikh felt that we could not afford to operate without Interior Minister “even if he has to come on a wheel chair.”

That was perhaps a little below the belt. After all, Nisar is no Roosevelt. But the deepest cut was dealt by his Pindiwal Sheikh Rasheed. While calling junior minister Baleeghur Rehman as “Tableeghi,” he suggested that the Interior Ministry should be abolished under the circumstances.

He believed Nisar was a misfit in the Interior Ministry. He quoted Nisar’s father saying to him that he wanted to send Nisar in the army and (Lt. General (R) Iftikhar into politics but blundered into sending them both to wrong professions. We could not tell if this was a compliment or not.

Whatever, the case, the general feeling was that the country needed a strong Interior Ministry, roughly on the lines of Homeland Security Department in the US. For we have suffered thousands of suicide attacks and have over 60,000 dead and counting. This should be far ghastlier than 9/11.

The News

June 20, 2014